English Monarchs poem: post-1066

monarchs pic

English Monarchs: a ditty

Vimeo – poem read aloud

This ditty’s a reminder of our history’s tendency,
To structure all our facts around who’s in the ascendency…

So after William the conqueror in 66 and 10,
‘Twas Rufus running England – yep, William again,
Henry One and Stephen brought an end to Norman rule,
The Plantagenets kicked off with Becket killer, Henry Two,

Then Richard Lionheart-ed, brave crusader came along,
And 1215 saw Magna Carta signed by brother, John,
For two score years and sixteen the third Henry took the stage,
Then Edwards One, Two, Three avoided Black Death like the plague,

Rich Two was ‘Revolt’-ed that the Peasants were so poor,
That he met his fate in prison at the hands of Henry Four,
Now the ruling house was Lancaster and soon at Agincourt,
Henry V beat the French, “For England and St George!”

War was quite ‘on trend’ so Henry Six fought ‘gainst the Yorks,
Edwards Four and Five made way for Rich Three and his horse,
At Bosworth Field in ’85 the Tudors were victorious,
Swiftly after Henry Seven came Henry Eight (notorious),

Ed Six, Jane and Mary One went by with quite a whizz,
Before the empire swelled under the Virgin queen dear Liz,
Excepting dreary Cromwells then the Stuarts played name tennis,
First James then Charles, then Charles then James unleashed their reigns of menace,

Then, bored of being tyrant, Will Three ruled with Mary Two,
And Anne made way for German Georges Four Three One and Two,
Sailor King Will Four died quickly leaving Vic as queen,
She ruled for 64 good years, the longest there had been,

Just like Prince Charles, son Edward Seven waited for so long,
He lasted nine years only, four years shy of World War One,
The speeches of the Georges gave the Wars their sad narration,
With brief respite for Edward Eight and crisis abdication,

Just like her darling corgis, Lizzie Two was groomed and primed,
And if she’s like her dear old mum she’ll be here for some time.
So while they’re mad and bad and often huge financial drain,
You can be one too… if you have blue blood in your veins.

© Joe Cooper 2012.

Amended 9/9/15 when Lizzie 2 beat Vic.


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